Motorway (Atari 8-bit Cassette 50 Game 20)

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You’re not really supposed to cross a motorway as a pedestrian. Especially when. you’re a pedestrian whose head is as big as the cars on that motorway, and you have the song ‘Jingle Bells’ looping around in that massive cranium of yours. You can see how that panned out for the protagonist of this game…

See the Amstrad version of Motorway
See the ZX Spectrum version of Motorway
See the Vic-20 version of Motorway
See the Commodore 64 version of Motorway
See the Acorn Electron & BBC Micro version of Motorway

Motorway (Amstrad Cassette 50 Game 45)

Experience the thrills and spills of being a delivery driver in a game that has absolutely nothing to do with a motorway at all.

See the ZX Spectrum version of Motorway
See the Atari 8-bit version of Motorway
See the Vic-20 version of Motorway
See the Commodore 64 version of Motorway
See the Acorn Electron & BBC Micro version of Motorway
See the ZX81 Version of Motorway

Motorway (Vic-20 Cassette 50 Game 45)

You’re a small  animal trying to stay alive in  5 lane motorway. I don’t think much of your….*SPLAT!*….

… chances.

See the Amstrad version of Motorway
See the Atari 8-bit version of Motorway
See the Commodore 64 version of Motorway
See the ZX Spectrum version of Motorway
See the Acorn Electron & BBC Micro version of Motorway
See the ZX81 version of Motorway

Motorway (ZX Spectrum Cassette 50- Game 14)

Today you’re going to go for a drive on a new kind of motorway. The type of motorway where you have to mow people down with your car, with no explanation as to the reasons why. I’m not sure I like the sound of that kind of motorway.

See the Amstrad version of Motorway
See the Atari 8-bit version of Motorway
See the Commodore 64 version of Motorway
See the Vic-20 version of Motorway
See the Acorn Electron & BBC Micro version of Motorway
See the ZX81 version of Motorway

Motorway (Commodore 64 Cassette 50 Game 20)

“Cross the road to rescue the girl” apparently. Which is hard when your character is as light as a feather and can get crumpled up by a remote control car.

See the Amstrad version of Motorway
See the Atari 8-bit version of Motorway
See the ZX Spectrum version of Motorway
See the Vic-20 version of Motorway
See the Acorn Electron & BBC Micro version of Motorway
See the ZX81 version of Motorway

Motorway (ZX81 Cassette 50 Game 20)

“Right Mr Collins, welcome to the Cassette 50 School of Motoring. Today you’re going to be driving down a Motorway”.

That sounds OK, I think I can handle that.

“Not so fast Mr Collins, this Motorway has seven lanes”.

Alright, well I’m still pretty confident that I’ll be OK as long as I stay aware of what’s going on around me. Maybe just stick to the inside couple of lanes just to be sure.

“Well, here’s the thing…”

Go on…

“You’re going to be driving straight towards the oncoming traffic”

Hmmmm. Something doesn’t seem quite right here. Anyway, off I go, see you back here in a few minutes…OH MOTHER OF GOD WHY CAN’T I SLOW DOWN? WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO THE BRAKES? OH FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK!

SPLAT.

See the Amstrad version of Motorway
See the Atari 8-bit version of Motorway
See the ZX Spectrum version of Motorway
See the Vic-20 version of Motorway
See the Commodore 64 version of Motorway
See the Acorn Electron & BBC Micro version of Motorway

Motorway (Acorn Electron Cassette 50 Game 20)

 

Note: the BBC Micro version is identical to the Acorn Electron version

Cassette 50 takes us on the motorway. Except on this motorway there are only two lanes and two cars. You have to avoid the other car. Which on the face of it doesn’t sound too difficult does it?

Well, just watch the video. I am the green car at the top, merrily driving along in my lane. Maybe singing along to the radio. Quietly, mind you, so that no one hears me.  I see the other car in the other lane and think “Well, there’s no chance of a collision here, he’s clearly in the other lane coming towards me and can see me. I’ll just stay here in my lane. Nothing is going to happen today. No crashes or anything….WHAT THE FUCK?! WHY DID YOU JUST SWERVE INTO MY CAR FOR NO REASON YOU FUCKER?”

“You crashed into the Computer” it says. No. He crashed into me. And he’ll be hearing from my insurance company.

See the Amstrad version of Motorway
See the Atari 8-bit version of Motorway
See the Commodore 64 version of Motorway
See the ZX Spectrum version of Motorway
See the Vic-20 version of Motorway
See the ZX81 Version of Motorway