I’ve given it a lot of thought, and I’ve come to the conclusion that if you decide you’re going to walk in front of missiles that are about to be fired, you’re going to get blown up.
Listen, I need to have a serious word with you. You’re in danger. You’re a sitting target. You might get hit. By a stray…drip of water.
Don’t say I didn’t warn you.
Not quite a sitting target, though. Because you can move and shoot back. Thinking about it, you’re not a sitting target at all. You great deceiver Cassette 50!
What a pain in the arse. Every time I want to go out of my house and go to the newsagent to buy the latest issue of Beanie Baby World I have to cross 10 lanes of traffic, and those drivers have no qualms about hurtling headlong into me and breaking my beautiful legs. Not so much a sitting target as a running and screaming target. Good job I have an ambulance on quick dial as this happens with alarming frequency.
Hold on, ambulance driver, could you perhaps give me a lift over the road to the newsagents so I don’t have to risk certain injury or even death?
Question for you. Suppose you work in a Fuel Depot and a load of freaky evil aliens came and took over, would you run away? Fuck yes you would. Another question for you. Suppose that in that same Fuel Depot where you worked that the freaky evil al…
Question for you. Suppose you work in a Fuel Depot and a load of freaky evil aliens came and took over, would you run away?
Fuck yes you would.
Another question for you. Suppose that in that same Fuel Depot where you worked that the freaky evil aliens had taken over, someone came along and started shooting a gun at anyone who poked their head through the front doors – would you run away out of the back doors?
Fuck yes, you definitely would.
Then why oh why do these stupid bastards who work at this Fuel Depot keep geting in the way of my bullets? Idiots! I’m only trying to shoot the freaky evil aliens you fools! RUN AWAY.
“WHY DON’T YOU GIVE UP?” questions the computer. I will take its advice.