Space Phallus


Admit it, you’ve always wanted to fly a disembodied dogs head around and shoot at giant spunking flying cocks and helicopter ballbags haven’t you?

Well now you can.

Space Phallus is available for Linux, Mac OS X and Windows from


So, strictly speaking this isn’t a retro game at all, having been released in 2013. However, I’m including it for two reasons. Firstly, it is very retro styled. And secondly because it has the bleakest, most depressing intro sequence of any game I have ever played.

Just watch:

If you’re one of the cool kids like me and you use Linux you can download it from the developers website. If you’re one of the uncool kids who uses Windows you can also download it. If you’re a Mac user then you are only pretending to be a cool kid and you can’t have it at all.